1.03.2011

How To: Hook A Prince

So I missed my opportunity with the first born... but I'm not giving up hope yet of becoming Queen. There's still one Prince left and he's the cute one anyways. Who wouldn't prefer the freckly ginger? 
We all know how Prince William chose the future Queen of England, Kate Middleton. She was strutting down the runway in a barely there sheer "dress" and William, who was sitting front row, said to his friend, "she's hot." Sounds like a scene straight out of a Disney fairy tale.
I know little about royalty but lots about the power sheer holds over the royals. So I now present to you:
 How To: Hook a Prince
Step 1: Go to Mall
Step 2: Get that Kate Middleton barely there dress.  Luckily for us it shouldn't be that difficult since sheer was all the rage on the Spring 2011 Runways. It is bound to be plentiful in the stores.
(Can't Remember), Alberta Ferretti, Christian Dior 
The more see- through the better. Harry want's to see what he's working with, ladies. 
VPL, Marc Jacobs, Reed Krakoff


Step 3: Do not forget underwear.
While the Prince does not necessarily value the "leave something to the imagination" motto of dressing, we musn't forget, when Harry decides it's time for you to meet the family that includes Queen Elizabeth... let's not give the ol' lady a heart attack.

Step 4: Book a ticket to London

Step 5: Stay away from law enforcement. 
I'm not really sure how strict England is about inappropriate display of public nudity but you'll definitely be pushing the limits in your new attire so it is best to stay away from law enforcement. No Prince will marry a lady with a record. 





Step 6: Catch Prince Harry's eye
Flaunt your new sexy sheer look at all hottest clubs... you're bound to get his attention.

Step 7: Fall in love.
Step 8: Get hitched. 
Step 9: Live Happily Ever After!

9 easy steps. It is really that simple. 
Now you must promise me that you won't forget who taught you everything you know when your sitting in your throne. I wouldn't mind some thank you heirloom jewelry in return. 


61 comments:

crazy pig said...

Oh, you're so funny :D Love this post.
And the Reed Krakoff design is awesome!

http://dark-blue-jeans.blogspot.com/ said...

WOW i love this post lol

so cool.

the dior dress is AMAZING.

Mary said...

Fantastic, I was planning at going to England this coming summer so maybe these tricks will come in use! ;)
Sadly the other one was cuter but hey, prince is always a prince.

Write this story down, Disney!

Amalie S. D. said...

Haha genius Tess!
I'll try that (;
xx

BIGRINGSANDCRAVINGS.BLOGSPOT.COM

FRANKIE HEARTS FASHION said...

You are hilarious Tess! Love it. I have faith that you can hook him and become a queen in no time!

Yajaira said...

funny funny.. love this post!!

Callahan Brooks said...

haha i love the post! good luck with that! really lovely blog as well, ill be following x

http://peaceandloveand.blogspot.com/

Christine @ Fanciful Vision said...

LOL! I love this! And I happen to be madly in love with Harry and always tell people how one day I'm going to marry him, so thanks to you.. who knows! :D

I'm your new follower! :)

x Christine
http://fancifulvision.blogspot.com

Mugdha said...

HAHAHA. Dude, I will definitely let you know if this ever works for me. Royalty, here I come!

jamie marie said...

thanks for following! i'm now following you too and can't wait to catch up on your blog!

and i will for sure follow these steps since i wouldn't mind being royalty!
xoxo, jamie

jamiemjenkins.blogspot.com

minnja said...

Yeah, I love this post :)))

LOVE
minnja

http://minnja.blogspot.com/

Paislea Elyse said...

aaaaaaaaaaaaahahahah!! i love this!!! if only it were that easy, huh!??!

that is way too funny! you made me laugh for sure!

allister bee blog

Rosie said...

I might give this a go ;) haha.
So funny!

Rosie x

heylila said...

haha, that is hilarious...! so "easy", too :)

bisous,
mia

heylilahey.blogspot.com

Marialaura Barbato said...

ahahahahahah love this post!!!!


http://fashionlivesalwaystwotimes.blogspot.com/


kisses from Italy

Amanda said...

You probably shouldn't have shared your tips because now you will have competition! Perfect post.

:), luckynumber3.com

p.s. I have a link to your blog on mine now...i hope you don't mind...if you do I'll remove it.

Fanny said...

funny post ! Kate have so much style x

www.thefashionmom.com

Alinne's Style said...

ahah funny post!
what do you think abou we follow each other! if you want leave me a comment. Kisses Alinne

www.alinnestyle.com

-

Frozen Fashion said...

Oh I didn't have number # on my list. I must remember to not let Her Majesty catch me without my knickers!

Such a glorious funny post! You made my day as atm I can even move one muscle in my body but I was able to use those five smile muscles!

♥♥

Ciao Ciao Bella Donna

Check out my Give Away @
http://hotfreezingfashion.blogspot.com/
Sharing Lots of Love n Fun!
♥♥

Jennifer Fabulous said...

You are adorable! I love this post. :)

I think this is perfect advice for snagging a prince. Hey, if it worked for Kate...lol.

ching said...

hahaha i enjoyed this so much. and seriously that's kate middleton?haha

Prutha said...

and ive been kissing all the frogs here instead!!! how stupid of me!!! hehehe

love love love this post

happy new yr hunny

Madeline and Sophie said...

Your blog is hilarious!
Watch one of your followers come out of the woodworks, take your idea into action, and snag Harry for herself!

LiezyL said...

love this post!
following your blog now!!
:))

CC said...

Haha, 9 steps doesn't sound too bad. I mean, the end result is definitely worth it, right? ;)
Xx

Morgan Jordan said...

Guh, I love the royal family. Wouldn't it be funny to be a part of them?

STYLOCRAT

sallyannie☆ said...

Cute post! When I read that story about the runway I totally thought that you were joking and were referring to that excellent Amanda Bynes movie...I can't believe it really happened!

The Robyn Diaries said...

Hahah love it! I always thought Harry was cuter too, and obviously a lot more fun to be around given his track record ;)

R x

briannelee said...

I think Prince Harry is way cuter!!!!

thebirthdaygirl said...

LOL! Yes just 9 easy steps!!
Heading over to the Mall now to get my sheer dress...great post!

Tess S. said...

Hey everyone thanks for the comments! Yes, that is indeed Kate Middleton and that is actually how they met!! Hard to believe, right?!

xxo Tess S.

Alyse said...

I laughed out loud at this! Great post. You're witty.

Z--- said...

good post!!xx

www.zscloset.blogspot.com

Angel In This Dress said...

Hahahaha! This post rules! I actually nearly fell off of my chair laughing :D

I just love your style of writing and plan to read more from you in 2011 - *new follower* - keep it up! x x

http://angel-in-this-dress.blogspot.com/

The Brunette Shake said...

I love your blog! It is so cute and funny :) I am now following you!! Please check out my blog & follow me too :)

xoxo

www.thebrunetteshake.com

Serena said...

I'm only willing to do this if I'm guaranteed a rock like Kate's ;)

Great post & blog- I'm your newest follower :)

thanks for stopping by!

http://www.materialtherapy.blogspot.com

x.S

Isabelle said...

hahaha what a great post! so funny
xoxo
http://storyofstyle.blogspot.com/

Christina said...

Thank you for you comment! :-)
I like you blog!
I'm following now!
Follow me too if you'd like :D

Lini said...

wow like your blog, well done <3

captain kimi said...

Oh your blog is a true discovery. I love your quirky posts. Very unique.
I'll stop by from time to time ;)

love, kimi

Allergic to Vanilla said...

ok, um this is hilarious!!! thanks for cluing me in on how it's done ;) xo lina
AllergicToVanilla.com

Yasemin said...

You're so funny! I love your sense of humor! :D Thank you for following my blog btw! I'm following yours too! I'm looking forward to reading your blogs!

xxx

yallehballeh.blogspot.com

Stacy said...

love it, so perfect

http://fashionhandglide.blogspot.com

Brittany said...

I've loved your last two posts, and your humor is very witty and I feel like I know you through your writing which is a +1 in my book :) haha

http://ittybittybomb.blogspot.com/

Sunny & Star said...

☺ Absolutely love your post.

And I agree. He is the cute one. ☺

Eugenia Woods said...

What an awesome post! I love it.

sbot said...

Hahah. funny post.

www.baublesandbangles.blogspot.com

-Stephanie

Phelanie said...

Hahah this is hilarious and I'm glad you love Prince Harry as much as I do. My favorite is the Alberta Ferretti look. x

Sarah said...

This is absolutely hysterical! I adore your blog and will certainly be following!

Marina said...

You are hilarious :)))

thanks for stopping and following my blog:)

kiss Marina

A N G E L A said...

GREAT POST!!! :D

xx

fashionbit

Madeleine said...

Hilarious..Love this post. So creative and for sure beats kissing frogs!
-Madeleine

Kassie said...

You're hilarious. That aside, I am totally attempting this when I go to London, just saying its worth a shot! I'll be sure to invite you to the wedding.

Stolen Stiletto

FASHIONABLE PRIS said...

You have a great sense of humour!! love this post!!

xxx

Pris

http://www.fashionablepris.blogspot.com/

Celine said...

So funny!!!!!
www.thewardrobediaries.com

Peony said...

Oh that's good! :)

Lily said...

Woman, you have hooked me to your blog. Haha, I love your sense of humor & the amazing fashion.

Salony said...

Haha, this is so funny, I just discovered your blog and it really makes me smile!

Elekon said...

OMG!!! I`ve heard a lot of jokes regarding William`s marriage, there even are new plates(decorative) devoted to Royal family: Wil, why not me? etc. etc but your post made me laught:)

www.elekonchicboutique.com

Cecylia said...

I love your wit and great sense of style! Yes sheer is gorgeous...maybe only in moderation though...practically speaking

20 York Street said...

Hear, hear!

I am your... drum roll please...

I am your 200TH Follower! This gots to be a milestone, yes?

I think we should open a bubbly! I know, any excuse to bring that up!

=)

Stay Happy and Positive!

besos,

ML


20 YORK STREET